I entered my bathroom and slowly locked the door.
Hot, almost boiling water was slowly filling my bathtub.
I wiped away the condense on both my mirrors with a sleeve and looked at myself. My reflection looked like a hard rock shell, that would be hollow if my soul wasn’t stuck in it.
As I cut off the rubber band holding my ponytail in peace, I feel the relief of my hair slowly falling past my shoulders.
I take a deep breath.
A shiver went up my spine as I put my left leg in the hot water. As soon as I sat down, wave of sadness surrounded my almost lifeless body. I can think here.
But I don’t want to.
This monotone world changed color as soon as my head hit the water.
As I opened my eyes water filled my ears and all I can see are waves of this numb liquid surrounding my tense body. The light is dimly shining through this bubbly and muddy water.
Water and tears.
I almost feel like drowning.
But my need to breathe this polluted air is bigger than my feelings.
My phone screen lit up and the notification sound remembered me, that there are still people in this world, who would like to see me clothed and smiling.
I got up.
Cold, single drops
Were rushing towards the floor.
I took my towel.
I feel the same way as I did before my skin touched the water.